Bernie, Biden, & trump

I didn’t write a blog post yesterday – some days with this chaos in the world are harder than others, and finding anything I feel like I have much to say about can be…a challenge. But then – a thing happened, and more things happened, and I’m super irritated with people now. I mean, that tends to be my default these days, BUT. This is an irritation about a thing that has great ramifications for me, my family, my city, my state, MY COUNTRY. Yep. The election.

So Bernie Sanders has officially withdrawn in the Democratic race. That pretty much leaves Joe Biden as the nominee. I mean, there’s no one serious left. Sure, you could vote for Capt. Crunch, or the Tooth Fairy, but I’m not sure that’ll get you anywhere? Or, like some did last time, you could write in a dead gorilla, but again – not really any help there.

Here’s the problem. We’ve got far too many people who have decided that they simply WILL NOT vote for Joe Biden. They don’t like trump, but they won’t vote for Biden. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DAMN PRIVILEGED (and snotty) THAT MAKES YOU SOUND?! Whether we like Biden or not, right now, WE. NEED. HIM. We have no other viable options left. It will be either trump or Biden that walks away the winner on election day – no one else. But guess what? Maybe stop looking at trump and Biden, and start looking at the possible EFFECTS of another trump presidency vs. a Biden one.

  1. I love RBG. Seriously. That woman is a BAD ASS. *However*, having said that, I don’t think she’s gonna make it another 4 years. And have we considered whether she even WANTS to? And it’s not just her! A justice could literally keel over at any moment, and do we want trump replacing them? Look where THAT got us. Truthfully – we’re voting less for President, and more for the Supreme Court, and for all the lower courts that trump and the GOP have been working (successfully, I might add) to stuff with conservatives. If you have to? PICTURE RBG when you vote for Biden. Because that’s what you’re doing anyway.
  2. I suppose, with everything going on, it’s…easy?…to forget that THERE ARE KIDS IN CAGES. STILL. And honestly, with everything going on, who knows how many of them have died a very sad death because they’re crammed in like sardines and if they caught COVID, they have nowhere to go? It seems silly to ask this, but…do you LIKE kids in cages? Because there will only be *more* of them if trump wins again.
  3. Speaking of COVID…it’s pretty well established that trump did literally EVERYTHING wrong when it comes to trying to handle this pandemic. And we’re paying the price in terms of friends, family, loved ones DEAD. I doubt that we will get through this without everyone knowing *someone* who died from COVID. And here’s the thing – this could happen again!! Do we *really* want trump doing this again? I mean…seriously?
  4. Women’s rights. Trans rights. Dreamer’s rights. SO MANY RIGHTS that are either on shaky ground, or have already been dismantled to at least some degree. It’s pretty frightening when a book that *used* to be a dystopian tale set sometime in the future has BECOME THE NOW. Trans rights have been trampled into the dust. Dreamer’s rights are on a damn fault-line that could go at any time. But, I mean…you do you?
  5. “But he did this thing and it was terrible”. Ok, there may be some valid points here. But the two biggest arguments I keep seeing are related to a) I don’t want a rapist in the White House, and b) ANITA HILL. Ok, well, here’s my response to a) – THERE’S ALREADY A RAPIST IN THE WHITE HOUSE. Who stands *credibly* accused of raping *many* women. Who has raped our institutions of their talent and knowledge. Who has raped our country of it’s money whenever humanly possible. Who has raped our democratic processes – AND WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO. I don’t know whether Biden did this thing or not. I question it, since he’s been vetted 6 ways to Sunday as VP. BUT. Even if he did – as much as it pains me to say it – his actions as President will *still* be LIGHT YEARS better than trump. (PS. Anyone who gives me shit about saying trump raped our institutions, etc. because it demeans women or whatever – go to hell. I’m a rape survivor. And it’s absolutely appropriate when talking about trump and what he has wrought.). As for b) – I don’t know about you folks, but I’ve changed a hell of a lot in my time. I am not the same person I was 26 years ago. I’ve matured. I’ve gotten kinder, more understanding. I’ve learned much more about black, white, and gray areas. I’m more patient, and I like to learn. I’m willing to learn to do and be better. I’d venture to say that these things would hold true for most people. We do not live in a vacuum. Nor a time capsule. People change from day to day, let alone year to year. And, again – even if he was the exact same person as he was 26 years ago? HE’S STILL BETTER THAN tRUMP. (Also? Anita Hill is actually voting for Biden. So…there’s that.)

Look. I get it. People hate “settling” for something, or feeling like they have no choice *but* to settle. But there is idealism, and there is reality, and somewhere the two have to meet. Idealism is where the candidate you believe in with all your heart gets the nomination and does amazing things. Unfortunately, we *all* can’t have our perfect candidate. Nor do we have a perfect democracy. But the one we have is super important, and it’s on ALL OF US who believe in what it stands for to work to keep it. And sometimes, that means voting for the candidate that has better policies – even marginally – than the other person…and then WORKING OUR ASSES OFF to hold that person accountable to what we believe is important. THAT is democracy. It’s *not* “protest voting”, or writing in some ridiculous “candidate”, or voting third party. Because that ISN’T democracy. That’s showing your privilege in that the future won’t affect you as much as it absolutely will others. It’s showing that you can’t play nice with others, even when actual lives are LITERALLY at stake. When our *country* may be at stake.

There’s a school of thought that says “they have to EARN my vote”. But I often think it’s actually the other way around. They get your vote because they’re the better candidate, and then you remind them – repeatedly, if necessary – that they are only in office BECAUSE of you. Make them earn that vote, and *keep* earning it. Hold their feet to the fire with the power of your collective voices. At that point, we’re upholding the ideals of this country. At that point, we’re working to make those changes we’re so hellbent on seeing. And at that point, we become *true* citizens of a democracy.

“She could just pack up and leave, but she does not visualize what’s beyond ahead.” ― Núria Añó

PSA: Trigger Warning – Domestic Violence

I read something the other day, and it has really stuck with me. I *think* I saw it on twitter (I have spent FAR too much time on there lately). A cop in – New York, I think? – was asked if they’ve seen any changes. The first thing he said, with no hesitation, was more domestic violence.

Think about that for a minute. About what it must be like for those people who are in a relationship with an abuser. Mental, physical, emotional – it can all be abuse. Now to be stuck at home with them, day in and day out, with absolutely NO idea of when it might end. Imagine the fear, and the torment those people are suffering right now, and with potentially no way out.

There is no “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” in a situation like that, particularly not during a pandemic. There is no way to make plans to leave, to hide things well – not when your abuser is home constantly. Where do you go? Are shelters even TAKING people? How do you sneak away when your nemesis is ALWAYS WATCHING?

This is the kind of thing that so many people are not even thinking about. This is the kind of thing that stands to affect so many lives even more than usual for the foreseeable future. It’s infuriating, and heartbreaking, and I worry for all the children stuck in the middle. It’s another piece of the mental health crisis coming down the pike that we are simply not prepared for. How many generations going forward will this crisis affect? And what will we, as a nation, do to help fix it?

Take care of one another, guys. Remember we’re all in this together, and some may be hurting more than you imagine. So be kind – online and in person.

NOTE: If you or a loved one are suffering from domestic abuse of ANY sort, please try and get help. The link below has information, a phone number, and even a chat line. There is a future beyond where you are now.