Yes, I’m Judging You

So, for those who follow this blog and weren’t aware, I work at possibly one of the BIGGEST germ factories it’s possible to be in. Nope – not talking about a school (though BLESS TEACHERS EVERYWHERE!). I’m talking…about the airport. *International* airport, even. One that sees a LOT of traffic coming through on a daily basis (though admittedly – nothing like an airport the size of, say…JFK). And with all of those people – the ones traveling, the ones greeting/saying goodbye, the kids, the folks working there…THAT’S A LOT OF GERMS. And, frankly, ones in which I have absolutely zero control. Which, normally – not a big deal. I’m *far* from being a germophobe, for sure. HOWEVER. With the coronavirus outbreaks, I’ve started paying more attention to the habits of the folks around me, and OMG it’s terrifying.

For example, I had one very nice lady in the store recently who *was so proud* of herself that, when she coughed – she coughed into her hand. Ummm…no? Because then, how many books or items did you turn around AND TOUCH WITH THAT HAND? And even worse, that implies that she normally…doesn’t? Just spews germs with the best of ’em? I was a little perturbed by all of that.

AND THE BATHROOMS. It’s an airport. Very busy, very public bathrooms. I cannot tell you how many people I see that DO NOT WASH THEIR HANDS. And if they do? It’s like, a 5 second rub around – at best. Then they take all those germs that had no chance of dying, and rub them around their hands a little more with the paper towels, then grab that door handle on the way out. *insert vomit emoji here*

Listen, I’m not an alarmist. I’m well aware that the coronavirus will not instantaneously kill us all the moment we get it. However, I *am* aware that there are people out there who dare NOT get it – the elderly, the young, the immunocompromised…and it’s up to all of us to do our part. Herd immunity really is a thing, folks, and even if you don’t care whether YOU get the virus – those people and their families DO care. Also, frankly, I just don’t want to get the damn thing. SO…here’s a quick primer:

1. When you cough or sneeze – NOT INTO YOUR HAND(S). Your upper arm or the crook of your elbow is the best space.
2. Wipe down spaces you share regularly – for example, there is a counter that customers touch all the day long, and I share computers with co-workers. Every so often, I’ll pull out a bleach wipe and go to town – on the keyboard, the mouse, the scanner, the counter, the phone…and, if my cell phone is handy? On that too – because THE GERMS ON PHONES WOULD TERRIFY YOU IF YOU THOUGHT ABOUT IT.
3. Hand sanitizer is a great option *if* you can’t wash your hands. But to be truly effective, you need a pretty decent amount – often the size of a quarter. You need to rub it in UNTIL IT’S DRY – no waving your hands in the air, peeps. That’s cheating. Make sure to get all over your hands, and between your fingers.
4. Try not to touch your face. Now, how many of you had the nearly UNCONTROLLABLE urge to itch/rub at your face when you read that? Welp. Don’t.
5. And of course – WASH YOUR HANDS. Wash them thoroughly, as in – tops, bottoms, between fingers, don’t miss your thumbs (I guess that’s a thing?), and under nails. We’ve all heard the 20 second rule, and about singing Happy Birthday. In the interest of MORE OPTIONS, I give you this – because not ALL heroes wear capes:

You're supposed to wash your hands for 20 sec, which is the time it takes to sing Happy Birthday twice. But I'm tired of singing Happy Birthday and you probably are too, so I've done the very important public service of compiling other songs with roughly 20 sec choruses to sing:

— Jen Monnier (@JenMonnier) March 2, 2020

Basically, peeps. Just use some common sense. Why take a chance if you don’t have to, and why not help those who CAN LITERALLY DIE if they get this by doing your part? Because yes – if I see you in the bathroom not doing the right thing? I *will* be judging you.